Love. Is tough.
Yeah, no happy little bow tie to the end of that sentence. Its just tough. Is it fulfilling, wonderful, fun and all sorts of other good things too? YES! But it doesn’t change the fact that love takes WORK.
Henry Ford once said…
“Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success”
Love does take a certain amount of work to make it successful and knowing a few key non-negotiables will help you navigate the playing field to finding a good match to work at it with. Relevant Magazine has a great article on just this: 3 Dating Non-Negotiables.
The third one really struck me.
3. Does This Person Realize They Still Have a Lot of Work to do on Their Own Character?
Have you ever met an older person who is really immature? Almost certainly. Do you know how that happens? They stopped growing up. When they were 25, someone told them they were “mature for their age,” so they decided to put their own moral and character development on autopilot. And when you encountered them many decades later, the “mature for their age” thing didn’t line up anymore. Now, they were behind for their age.
Someone who seems well adjusted at 25 will seem extremely childish by the time they’re 35 or 45 if they haven’t used life’s lessons to develop any further as time has passed.
Understanding that we never really “arrive” at some level of ultimate personal growth is a good thing. Letting God continually work in us and being a forever student of His leading in our lives will ultimately lead to a more fulfilling life in love.
-Carlos