Recently I found myself sick with Covid for a second time!

By the third day stuck at home, I was so bored and ready to be out of the house. But since I couldn’t, I took to social media. I asked my Instagram followers to ask me any questions they had and, while some were lighthearted or just plain funny, a few had a more serious side…like this one:

I’m actually so thankful for this question because it made me stop and think – not just on how I’d answer it for this person but how I’d answer it for me. The truth is, I needed the reminder myself.

Being single at 40—with no obvious “ending” in sight—comes with its own internal battles. I’ve had them. I still do. And with a foggy, slightly dramatic case of “Covid brain,” here’s what I came up with:

• I wouldn’t say that I’m strong all the time. Not even close. But I do try to remember that God has promised to provide me with all that I need. If I don’t have a man right now, maybe it’s because the Lord knows I don’t need one to fulfill what He’s called me to do. But, when He's ready to change that, I am more than ready to accept 😂
• I also keep a running list of all the ways I’ve seen Him show up for me – especially in moments I didn’t even know I needed something. He was faithful then and He’ll be faithful now.
• And that love I’ve been storing up – the kind I thought would be used for a husband and kids? I use it instead on the people God has placed in my life. I strive to love them like Jesus. Some days it’s easy. Some days I don’t even care to try. But He knows. And He understands.

Maybe you’re in a similar season of waiting. It may not be for a spouse - it could be healing, direction, or peace. Whatever it is, I hope this encourages you to know: you are not alone. We’re all carrying something.

The key is to keep coming back to God with it. You don’t have to have it all figured out (Lord knows I don’t). But keep coming back to Him. And be honest with Him! Share your hurt. Share your pain. He already knows anyway!

And in the meantime? Try and focus on the good and all the love God has surrounded you with. And if all else fails…

Turn off Hallmark and turn on Dateline. Nothing makes you better about counting your current blessings than watching as a woman ignores every red flag, marries the guy, and ends up being the subject of a Keith Morrison episode saying, “She lit up every room she walked into…”

Stay true to the call God's put on your life. You and I have got this! 

Three Apartments, Two Cats, and One Big Lesson on Contentment