The holiday season is supposed to be a time of joy and peace, but that isn’t always the case. It’s especially hard when Christmas brings up the pain of losing a loved one. That’s the case with Stephenie who shared her Hot Mess story with John from Rock House Center.

Stephenie’s Story:

Three years ago, I lost my absolute best friend to suicide. It was a week before I was coming home to visit for the holidays, and I had just talked to him the night before. Every year in college, one of the highlights to coming home was seeing him and his family.

I now live back at home, and because I don’t have many friends anymore after turning my life around, I find it very hard to exist during the holidays.

Christ has constantly reminded me that I have so much to live for. However, I find it hard to listen to His voice during these holidays, especially since this is the time of year people message me about losing our friend. Some people even blame me around this time as well. My boyfriend and I do something extra for people in need this time of year. I thought that would help me feel better, but it doesn’t.

Help me find the joy in the holiday season again!?

John’s Response:

The first thing John addressed was the void that the loss of a loved one can leave: “People can be locked onto old relationships. What we often find…is that there was a real dependency on that person at a level almost of the kind of dependency that we want to be having on God.”

It can be easy to get stuck in this place. We often count on that other person to give us assurance about life and a sense of community. John recommended having a conversation with God–asking Him to take that place in our hearts and trusting Him to give us that sense of peace about how life feels.

It’s all about moving it from our head to our heart, which can be hard sometimes. John reminded Stephenie: “Satan would love us to be isolated and think about the things that we’ve lost, but God is trying to pull us into a relationship and an understanding that you have it all in Him.”

Satan loves us to be isolated & think about the things we’ve lost; God is reminding us that we have it all in Him.

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Hear John’s complete response here:

If you’d like to talk to John about something that makes you feel like a hot mess, tell us about it below. While we won’t be able to talk with everyone, our goal is to reach out to as many people as possible. If you’d like to see what Rock House Center is all about or even schedule an assessment, click here.